Weeks after our movie night, Dani appeared to get better. She sulked less and started dressing like herself again. By that I meant, with more effort than I ever put into my outfits during the week. I wasn’t going to take credit for anything, but I noticed that Dani’s change in attitude only became more apparent the more time she spent with Otto.
Yeah, I was going to take credit for that. She’d deny it, but when I looked up at her from the floor where I was sorting through my papers, I had every bit of proof I needed.
“So, Otto and I are heading to the arcade and to grab some beers. You in? Sabin’s welcome, of course.”
I cocked my head to the side and smirked. “You’re going out to the arcade?”
“Yeah,” she scoffed.
“Yeaaaaah,” she grinned. “Now, don’t say anything. I’m just going to let this play out. I mean, he even invited me to come visit his family with him.”
“Oh wow, that’s really good though. You like him, huh?”
Dani rolled her eyes, “Are you coming or not?”
I took a moment to think about it, but I just kept thinking about how Otto was already thinking about introducing Dani to his family and they weren’t even officially dating, as far as I knew. On my end, Sabin did meet my family, but it wasn’t often he talked to me about his family. Guess that stumped me for a second before I looked back up at Dani.
“Ah, I think we’ll pass this time. We planned on staying in and getting some studying done. I have an exam next week and he offered to help. Maybe next time? I’m pretty good at skeeball,” I smirked.
Dani didn’t seem convinced. “A night in, as in, you two are getting busy?”
“You make that joke every time,” I stated.
“And it never gets old.” Dani smirked and grabbed her coat. “Well, be safe with your studying!”
Before I even got a chance for a comeback, Dani was out the door.
It sounded funny to her and I’m sure to anyone who heard any of our conversations while passing by, but I guess I felt a little off. Now, I wasn’t holding back from having sex because I was terrified. I wanted to, believe me. Sabin was older than me, some would say significantly older, and I really loved him, more than anyone before. In fact, he was the first person I even considered sleeping with. In my head, I pictured the perfect moment where I would look attractive and be super smooth with my words. I didn’t want that dirty stuff, but the right set of words that would just make the moment perfect. Being that Sabin was older, I knew that he definitely had more experience than I did, so I didn’t want to come off as this inexperienced child. I hated that feeling but what if he would be super into it and I would just lay there like a pancake? I couldn’t handle that. Ugh. The thought made me tense, but I tried to shrug it off. Maybe it would just be easier to go ahead and study.
Later at Sabin’s place we spent a good hour going over our studies before we landed on the couch with the TV on. As usual, we had on “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia”. The ridiculous antics of the group never failed to make us laugh. It was the perfect show to have on in the background.
“God damn rum ham…gets me every time,” Sabin chuckled.
I’ve seen that episode so many times and I still found it hilarious, but instead of watching Danny Devito on the screen, I stared at Sabin. I couldn’t stop thinking about him and well, who he was. As much as I already knew, I wanted to know more.
“You know, I can feel you staring at me, right? Do I have a booger hanging out of my nose?”
Half-snorting, I shook my head. “No, just thinking.”
Now apparently interested, Sabin paused the show and turned to face me. “Want to talk about it?”
I actually did.
“I already feel like I know a lot about you, but come to think of it I haven’t heard anything about your family. What are they like?” I smirked. “You basically know my family and they already love you…”
With a long sigh, he scratched his head. “Wow, where to begin. I have three sisters, all who are younger. So, I guess I’ve always been very protective of them, but they’re the same way with me, considering, well, you know…”
“What are they like?”
I watched Sabin’s cool exterior soften the moment I asked him. “Leela is the oldest girl, but still 3 years younger than me. She’s definitely spirited. She’s the only kid in my family that settled down and got married. So far, at least.”
He soon shifted his position on the couch and sighed happily. “Then there’s Moli. She’s the middle sister who definitely has more of a rebellious side. Acting out and all that. She’s studying film in New York. She has spirit and it definitely helped having her around when I returned home after my deployment. She’s that spunky kid that keeps you distracted from the monsters in your head.”
“So far, I feel like I’d love all of them,” I uttered.
“That makes me really happy to hear, but wait till the third little lady.” He clicked his tongue and chuckled. “That’s Poppy. She’s the youngest and well, that about says it all. She’s quiet and kind, and I feel like I’m writing their dating profiles. Jesus.”
Amused, I leaned into him and kissed his cheek. “Well, they sound amazing. I’d love to meet them some day.”
“And I’d love that, too. Sorry, I didn’t bring it up. I’ve been trying to keep tabs on all this crap going on. Therapy, class, and wanting to seem normal enough for you.”
“It’s true, though. My family means everything to me. Introducing you in person would be a big step considering the last time I had a serious relationship it ended up poorly. I mean, a real shitstorm.”
“What do you mean, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“I don’t mind at all. It’s just, the second time I was deployed, I was engaged to a girl I knew since I was a little shit, you know? We were inseparable until the incident overseas and well, when I was diagnosed with PTSD. She couldn’t handle the episodes, the screaming, and the anxiety. She left me for a guy she was seeing while I was away…”
All this was new to me and it came crashing down like a cyclone.
It felt like a kick to the face, but it was nothing in comparison to what Sabin must have felt. All I knew was that I wouldn’t, no, I couldn’t even think of doing something like that to him.
He chuckled and wrapped his arm around my shoulder to bring me in closer against him. “So, as distant as I am sometimes, I want you to know I love you. I really enjoy the time we spend together like this. You’re beautiful and you make happier than I’ve been in years. The things you do to me,too,” he smirked when my face turned two shades of a deeper red. “Do you know that it’s hard not to kiss you when you make that face? Can’t keep my hands off you…”
I didn’t know what it was, Maybe it was the strength of his grip around me, or how intoxicating his breath was, but my heart was pounding incredibly strong in my chest to the point it could be heard how staggered my breathing was.
“Wow…are you okay?”
My next moves weren’t too thought out. It didn’t look like something out of a romance novel. Not even close. I quickly wrapped my arms around him and kissed him with such passion that I could feel him flinch against me. He could have pushed me away, but his body reacted in response to mine with just as much emotion that ended up with his hand pushing against the small of my back to get me as close as I possible get.
“What’s going on here?” Sabin whispered against my lips before gently nipping at my lower lip.
Unable to answer, my hands crawled up his shirt. My fingers traced his muscles like braille and I found myself urging him to do the same to me. I wanted Sabin to touch me with a hunger that I could only imagine in my filthiest thoughts. I wanted him more than I could verbally admit, but I had to. He was surprised, but not rejecting my advances. I couldn’t pretend I knew exactly what I was doing anyway.
“Y-you keep doing this to me and I won’t be able to stop,” Sabin exhaled against my neck. His arms were snaked around me and already under my shirt where his hands found their way to my breasts.
“Please don’t. I want this, Sabin. Do you?”
He pulled away for a moment and nodded. “O-okay. Absolutely. Yeah…”
I felt like I was impressing him, especially since when we were making out, I could feel the bulge in his pants against my leg. God–I wanted so much for this to finally happen, but I felt like I would make a fool of myself unless I told Sabin that he was going to be my first.
“I just,” I groaned, “I just wanted to let you know that I haven’t done…”
My lips didn’t even have to utter the words to finish the sentence before Sabin got up from the couch, picking me up in that same motion.
“You want me to stop anything at any moment, you just let me know,” He said quietly. “If something doesn’t feel good, or if it does, just let me know…”
“It doesn’t bother you, though, that I haven’t had sex before?”
Sabin rolled his eyes. “All I care about– all that matters to me is you. No, it doesn’t bug me.”
I could feel his heavy breath against my chest when he returned his focus to what was going on between us. His sighs were deep as his hands traveled all over my back and down to my rear. Was I really doing that to him? I kind of liked that.
We ended up in his room and returned to our embrace, except this time while our lips were locked and traveling from each others mouths to our necks, and arms, we were working on stripping each other of our clothes. Sabin’s shirt went flying to the other side of his bedroom before he dropped to his knees to kiss my stomach while his quick fingers undid the buttons on my shorts.
Oh my god…
I held my breath in hopes that I wouldn’t let out a sound, but the way my body flinched was enough to give away how I was feeling.
Impatiently, I shimmied out of my shorts and kicked them out of the way. I did the same with my shirt, which finally left me exposed in front of him. I thought about this moment for the longest time. Standing in front of someone who I was ready to sleep with and it wasn’t just some smutty dream I was having. No, this was the real thing.
My face was red-hot, but I didn’t want to pause.
Sabin was still down on his knees, his lips grazing the edge of my panties while one of his hands pushed me closer into him. His hot breath against my skin resulted in goosebumps erupting all over my arms and legs, and especially my stomach. His light grazing turned into hot kisses from my stomach to between my legs. I could barely stand by then. I had to hold onto his head, doing my best not to pull his hair, before I was ushered to the edge of the bed.
“My god are you beautiful,” He smiled widely. “Every inch of you.”
“Words are nice, but why don’t you show me, and I’ll show you how much I like you, too.” My words were laced with lust of adrenaline-juiced hormones. Even I turned red when I heard myself, but it only seemed to fuel Sabin’s desire to get closer to me. He seemed to enjoy it and I wanted every bit of him. I wanted to touch him, taste him–I moved back on the bed and watched him follow until my head was resting on his pillow and my face was cradled in his hands. He soon moved down to my breasts, nipping at my skin in between kisses. Each peck inched lower and lower…
“Ahh!”I exclaimed when I felt Sabin’s lips between my legs. Sure I touched myself, but what he was doing to me did not compare to the one-woman show.
I felt him flick his tongue, tasting my wetness. “Is that good? Let me know how much you like it,” he smirked, lowering his head back.
“O-oh god, Sa–”
“S-Sabin, let me feel you…”
My body trembled under him when he crawled back on top of me. Before he even had a chance to confirm, again, if I really wanted to sleep with him, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him in close. My lips instantly found their way to his. I was more than ready for a lot of things with him, but this was something truly special. In the midst of the heat, I watched Sabin’s body. I observed every scar on his stomach and his arms. I couldn’t imagine loving anyone but him, not just in that moment, but every moment in between.
I knew in the back of my mind that it wouldn’t exactly be the best feeling at first. The pressure was rough, but Sabin took it slow until I began to relax. It got better with each thrust of his hips into me, and with each touch. But what really mesmerised me was hearing Sabin moan. His forehead was beaded with sweat, but each time he looked in my eyes, he never fought back a smile.
“It’s not raining sweat on you, is it?” He chuckled, kissing my cheek.
“No,” I giggled.
Laughter aside, our bodies moved in sync that afternoon. Despite the occasional discomfort, I enjoyed every minute of it. I was lost in ecstasy with Sabin and I didn’t want to come back. Of course, unlike movies that talk about making love for hours on end, our time wasn’t quite that long. We were human after all, and we got tired. but it didn’t mean that we didn’t go back for seconds…and thirds. I didn’t think that I could get tired of him and all the ways he made me feel. Physically, he satisfied me in every way I could think of. Emotionally, I loved him and I wanted him to always know that. I didn’t know every detail of his previous relationship, but I would never give up on him. What we had was a partnership, and I would stand by him. Always.
When we finally decided to slow down, we still didn’t get dressed or even think of leaving his bedroom. Instead we watched each other and basked in the moment of what just happened.
“How are you feeling?” Sabin asked, playing with a strand of my hair.
“Mmm, tired, but great.”
“Did you want to get any of that studying done?”
Of course that was a joke, but I still shook my head and nestled against him.
“Frankly, I’m just going to enjoy being near you while not thinking about studying, or what I’m going to tell Dani when she asks how my afternoon was.”
“You think she’d know?”
I sat up. Oh, if only he knew.
“Dani will know the moment I step in the room. My face always gives it away, I’m sure. Plus, we have a 6th sense type of thing when it comes to stuff like this. We’re basically sisters at this point. We’ve come to know the norm, but this?” I pointed to his body and then my own. “This she will know immediately.”
Intrigued, Sabin reached over to take my hand in his, “What would you say about this then?”
He snorted. “Whatever you’d call it.”
“A great experience with a man I love,” I paused and shifted my position, “that may result in some soreness tomorrow.”
Before Sabin could utter another word, we heard the door to their apartment slam shut.
“Yo, Sabin! You here?” It sounded like Dani and Otto’s arcade date ended earlier than anticipated.
“Alma with you?”
Not how I pictured this.
Sabin quickly slipped into his jeans and stuck his head out from him room. “What’s up?”
I couldn’t see what Otto’s expression was, but I could only imagine what I would be hearing later.
“Uh…sorry to interrupt, but Dani has been blowing up Alma’s phone for the last 4 hours.”
While Sabin was talking with Otto, I sprang from the bed and worked on picking up my clothes from the floor. I didn’t even try to keep it down. Otto already knew I was there.
“Hey Alma! Having fun?” I heard him say, half-chuckling.
“Uh-huh! Can you text Dani that I’ll get back to her soon?”
I was frazzled to say the least when I finally got my clothes on and ran out of the room to yank my phone out of my backpack.
5 Facebook messages.
2 phone calls.
All from Dani.
“Oops,” I winced at the sight of my poor phone blown up with notifications. I did my best to scroll through all the messages, but I kept seeing:
“BITCH! GET OVER HERE!”
Clearly, it was something of a significant importance. How could I tell? The phone calls. Dani never calls unless the Earth is shattering. At this point I was slightly worried, so I ran back to Otto, gave him a quick hug, and wrapped my arms around Sabin before giving him a quick peck on the lips.
“Love you! I’m so sorry, but I have to go see what’s going on with Dani!”
Was the campus on fire? Did I miss a fight?
Oh my god.
Did she kill my plant?
At this point, I quickened my pace into a legitimate run.
God, I hoped everything was okay…